


Day #16: My Youth, My Youth Is Yours, A Truth So Loud You Can't Ignore

by OJared



Series: The Christmas You Get You Deserve.  Destiel Ficmas. [21]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dead Castiel, Dead Dean, Death, Ficmas, Ficmas Day #16, First Time, Fluff, Heaven, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-17
Updated: 2015-12-17
Packaged: 2018-05-07 05:16:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5444606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OJared/pseuds/OJared
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean's own personal Heaven and Cas has been waiting for him for years.</p><p>Or</p><p>The one where God gave Dean three of the things he wanted most.  His bunker bedroom, his charming good looks and Castiel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Day #16: My Youth, My Youth Is Yours, A Truth So Loud You Can't Ignore

**Author's Note:**

> Title from [Youth by Troye Sivan](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Io2Yjy3nV_c)

“Hello, Dean.” Cas greeted as Dean entered his bedroom, looking worn and fed up.

 

Dean jumped at Cas’ voice.

 

“What the hell are you doing in my room?” He grumbled, ignoring that Cas was stretched on the bed and collapsed down next to him.

 

He could feel Cas’ eyes burning into him and then he felt his hand being picked up gingerly by him. Dean looked up to see Cas inspecting each tiny cut and scar on his hands and fingers as if they were the most precious thing he had ever seen, but then he looked Dean in the eye and that thing changed.

 

“I was waiting for you to come home.” Cas stated, his mouth barely moving around the whisper as his heart ached and creaked.

 

“Well, I’m home.” Dean says, quirking up one side of his mouth.

 

Cas nodded, still completely serious.

 

“I didn’t think you were going to be here.” Dean murmured, letting the fear seep into his tone and carry his voice.

 

He enclosed his hand around Cas’, entwining their fingers. Dean was slightly clammy but Cas didn’t mind. It was Dean, he never minded when it was Dean.

 

“I’m always here.” Cas replied with a sigh, as if he was tired of telling Dean. He would never leave and he would do everything within his power and more to always be by Dean’s side.

 

“No, you aren’t. You haven’t been there for forty years.”

 

Cas wanted to reply but he didn’t know what to say. He had no excuse, nothing but guilt that wasn’t supposed to be there.

 

“I got old, Cas. Like, grey haired, slow and no sex drive old. And you weren’t there.” Dean’s voice cracks towards the end and Cas’ heart cracks a little right down the middle.

 

“I tried. I didn’t know what to do. I was so scared.” It’s Cas’ turn for his voice to crack only this time a single tear slips down his cheek. He lifts a hand to wipe it away and he stares at his damp finger for a while. He’s never cried before, he didn’t even know it was possible.

 

“I know. I’m sorry, how did you get here?” Dean apologises, sitting up further in the bed.

 

“I don’t know.”

 

Dean can hear the desperation in the other man’s voice and he realises that this sort of thing, the hand holding and the pure intimacy of the moment had never happened before. He then catches sight of himself in the mirror but he doesn’t see himself, well, he does, but not him. It’s young him. The him that knew Cas and was happier than ever, even if he didn’t know it at the time.

 

“I always wondered what it would be.” He whispers, pressing a hand into the memory foam mattress, not believing it was actually there.

 

“What what would be?”

 

“My Heaven.”

“Our Heaven.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I don't know if this is any good but I really enjoyed writing it!
> 
> Sorry, it's short.
> 
> Kudos and comments welcome.
> 
> Merry Christmas!


End file.
